


Destiel Oneshots

by ryandoesntdrive



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, beginning of relationship mostly, mostly just a bunch of fluff, not slow burn, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-14 22:47:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28928271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryandoesntdrive/pseuds/ryandoesntdrive
Summary: A bunch of Destiel-centered oneshots from yours truly!
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Jack & the boys
Kudos: 3





	1. Kaleidoscope Eyes

"Goddamn it Cas, I love your eyes," Dean said while he sat across from his best friend, barely five inches between them. Of course, this wasn't the first time Dean was realizing this. He'd had feelings for Cas for about nine years now, but nothing had happened between them other than friendship.

Dean was starting to get frustrated and impatient, which led to him drinking a lot of alcohol. Sam and Jack had gone to sleep hours ago, so it was just Dean and Castiel up watching Scooby-Doo. 

"Thank you, Dean." Cas looked surprised at the statement, but he had never really been well-versed in human communications or expressions (even unconscious ones) of love, so he didn't see how much Dean was trying to say with that one comment. 

"No, really, they're like..." Dean tried to find the right words. "It's like they hold oceans inside them. They're beautiful. Just like you are, Cas." 

Castiel paused for a minute. "Dean, it's late, you should probably sleep. Aren't you and Sam heading out tomorrow?"

"Yeah. But first, I wanted to play you a song that Sam found a while ago. I think you'll like it." Dean had been planning this moment for days, going over it in his head and bouncing ideas off of Sam until he got tired of his brother and made Jack endure Dean's obsessiveness instead. 

Dean pulled out Sam's laptop after shutting off the TV. He went to YouTube and played the song that his whole plan depended on. He could barely control his body, but he kept going. Being drunk enough to not care as much but not too drunk to not remember this really helped him go through with it.

The song started playing through the computer, a little distorted by the wood of the table he set it on.

"I'm a disappearing act done poorly  
But if I ever get it right, you'll miss me sorely  
Look like the cat that just ate the canary  
Coughing up feathers  
There's a get out of jail card  
If I can think of something clever  
"I plead the fifth on all of this."

Cas smiled. "I know this artist. Jack listens to them sometimes."

"When your chips are down  
And your drinks are all gone  
I'll still be here wishin' and waitin' for you to come on  
Kaleidoscope eyes sparkle at the world  
My emerald city downtown girl  
In the sickness of you  
I'm just a white blood cell, fighting like hell for you."

Dean was staring at Castiel now, hoping against hope that the angel would get the message Dean was trying to send. And it looked like he did because Dean could see Cas' mind was racing. His eyes held so many emotions, some of them Dean had never seen before. They were flickering back and forth, almost like he was looking past the room. 

Cas paused the song and turned to look at Dean, whose heart was almost beating out of his chest. "Dean, I..."

"Oh." Dean closed the computer. "Yeah, no... I get it." Dean stood up and walked as fast as he could to his room, locking the door as soon as he got in. 

Cas, meanwhile, was too shocked to follow him yet. He had been in love with the hunter all this time too, and it had been so long, he didn't think either one of them would ever make a move. He was standing in a hurricane of disbelief, joy and confusion. Finally, Cas worked through his emotions enough to move and stood at Dean's door, listening.

He heard quiet shifting noises, which meant Dean probably wasn't asleep yet, which was good. Cas knew Dean was an angry sleeper, like a bear. 

Cas knocked softly on the door, trying not to wake Jack and Sam. After a few seconds, he heard the door unlock and hesitantly open. Standing before him was, in Castiel's opinion, the most beautiful man in all of creation, even with his red-tinged eyes.

Cas' stomach dropped. Dean had been crying. Because of him. 

"Dean, I'm so-"

"What do you want, Cas?" Dean's tone made Cas' heart collapse in on itself. This was the total opposite of anything Cas would ever want to do. All the angel ever wanted was to make Dean happy, and here he was making his best friend cry. 

"Dean, please. Can we talk?"

"Yeah, I guess. Come on in." Dean moved aside to let Cas through the doorway, closing the door behind him. "What did you want to talk about?"

"This." Cas surprised Dean by rushing forward and kissing the hunter, desperate, yet sweet. Dean's eyes widened, but he soon melted into the kiss, completely forgetting all of his surroundings. His only thought was that Cas' lips tasted like mint - refreshing and electrifying his entire body. 

Cas softly tugged at Dean's hair, pulling away after a few seconds. His face was flushed and his lips glossy, a serene smile sitting on them. 

"Cas, what the hell was that for?" Thankfully, Dean only sounded surprised, not angry.

"Well, I didn't think you were going to make an actual move any time soon, so I did. I understood what you were trying to tell me earlier. I feel the same way, too."

Dean could only sputter wordless noises for about five minutes.


	2. Reputations

A/N: Hey, Ryan here. I've had this thing in the works since like last summer, and I for some reason haven't finished it until now, but I wanted to publish something for Dean's birthday, so here ya go. Enjoy!

"I heard he killed Hitler," one hunter, Jim, said to another, Dale. They were catching up that week in their favourite bar and they got to the topic of Dean Winchester.

"Well, I heard," Dale began, "that he killed an entire nest of fangs after being turned into one." 

"I've got you beat. I heard," Jim leaned in close and lowered his voice like it was a secret, "that he's dating an angel." He leaned back away and took a drink of his beer.

"Nah, no way," Dale said, waving the idea away. "Those angel chicks are total stiffs."

"Ah, ah, ah. Not a chick." Jim leaned in again and whispered, "It's a dude."

"What?" Dale asked in disbelief. "No way."

Jim started to say, "Yeah, way," but right then, the door of the bar opened and speak of the devil-killer, in walked Dean Winchester himself. Beside him was a man with dark hair and a tan trench coat. "That's him!" Jim whispered, excited. "That's the angel!"

"Alright," Dale said. "Let's make a bet. Whoever is wrong has to... buy the other a steak."

"I'll take that bet." Jim and Dale shook hands, and the whole deal was settled before Dean and the angel sat down at the bar a stool away from them, Dean on the closer side.

"Hey, you're that Winchester guy, right? Dean?" Jim asked in fake nonchalance.

Dean looked over and saw Jim's flannel and recognized him as a hunter. "Yeah, I'm Dean. And you are?"

"I'm Jim, this is Dale," Jim offered, gesturing to his friend.

"Good to meet ya." Dean shook hands with both Jim and Dale before gesturing to the angel at his side. The angel didn't say anything until Dean elbowed him in the side.

"My name is Castiel," the angel said in a gruff, serious voice. He stiffly held out his hand to the two hunters, who shook it.

"So, you two finishin' a hunt or somethin'?" Dale asked.

"Yeah, a... what was it again, Cas?"

"A tzitzimitl that had somehow found its way into Texas," Castiel explained.

"Yeah, that thing," Dean said, acting like he totally remembered what it was. Dean finally caught the attention of the bartender and started to order two beers, but Dale offered to buy them. Dean politely refused, but Dale insisted.

"Come on, you two and your brother saved the world, probably more times than any of us know. It's the least we can do."

"Alright, fine," Dean conceded. "So anyway, we came into town because people kept finding bodies with charred chest cavities - no hearts. Obviously, we're thinkin' werewolf from the jump, but this one here," Dean elbowed Castiel, "wasn't so sure." He smirked at the angel, who frowned.

"If I hadn't insisted it wasn't a werewolf, you would've gone in and gotten yourself killed-"

"Yeah, yeah, I know." He subtly pat the angel's leg, just for a second, but Jim noticed it, smiling smugly at Dale. 

Dale, still stubbornly wanting to prove his friend wrong, tried to keep Dean talking. "So, uh, you were sayin'? Charred chest cavities?"

"Right, right." Dean took a swig of his drink. "So anyway, I dug into the local records, and this sort of thing had been happening once every fifty-two years like clockwork. Always five men, always missing hearts with burned chest cavities. By this time, Cas had convinced me it wasn't a werewolf." Dean and Cas shared a familiar chuckle, and once again, Jim smiled smugly.

"How'd you find the thing, though?" Dale asked, grasping at anything to continue the conversation. He would not go down this easy.

"Ah, right. Funny story, actually. I noticed this old, rundown warehouse on the way into town, way far away from people. Long story short, we found out it was abandoned - huge red flag right there. We drove in, scoped the place out when Cas saw something through the windows."

"There was a young man strapped to a table, and a strange woman in a dark corner," Castiel explained, taking a drink and squinting. 

"Yeah. So we went in, and this chick- I mean, she had dark skin, and I mean like pitch-black, with stars moving all across her skin. She tried to scratch me up real good, nicked my arm a few times with these razor-sharp nails, but I kept her distracted while Cas freed the kid."

"What happened next?" Dale asked, leaning forward, almost completely forgetting the bet. 

Cas answered this time. "I found a golden dagger lying on a table, and I thought it might do the trick. I stabbed her from behind, straight through her heart, but she turned around and knocked me back into the wall. Dean kept fighting her, and I tried to think of something I had forgotten, something that we could kill her with. Finally, I remembered her weakness: sunlight. I snuck away to one of the windows - I noticed they were unusually dark - and I found a heavy stone on the ground. I smashed it through the window, and-"

"And this perfect beam of sunlight shot right at her," Dean finished. "She burned up, catching fire quicker than I could even see. She burned to just a little pile of ashes."

"Whoa," Jim said simply, as did Dale. "And the kid?"

"Alive," Castiel answered. "We drove him to the hospital, but aside from a few scrapes and mild dehydration, he was fine."

"Gonna need a lifetime of therapy bills probably," Dean admitted, "but fine."

"Hm." Jim took a long drink from his bottle, finishing it off. "What's next for you two, then?"

Dean rubbed a hand over his chin, deep in thought. "Probably head back home, catch up with Sam and the kid. See how Eileen's doin', too. She just came back from a long hunt."

"Eileen Leahy?" Dale asked.

"Yeah, you know her?" Dean once again subtly touched Castiel's hand, only for a split-second. It seemed careful, calculated, just quick enough that any passersby wouldn't see it unless they were looking for it, but meaningful enough that the angel would notice it. 

Interesting, Jim thought. Very interesting. Looks like I should hold off on making dinner for Jordan tonight. 

"Yeah, I've run into her a few times before, on hunts," Dale explained. "She's a damn fine hunter."

"That she is," Dean agreed, Castiel nodding. 

"So anyway, uh," Jim shifted on his stool, trying to get concrete proof to win this bet. "How'd you two meet, anyway? I mean, everyone's heard of you guys and your brother stopping the Apocalypse and stuff, but no one really knows how that happened."

Castiel, who was clearly much less shy with the physical contact, placed a hand comfortingly on Dean's. "I, uh... I rescued Dean from Hell fifteen years ago."

"Long story there, but, uh, Cas has been family ever since."

Jim sensed that they didn't want to elaborate any more. He got it, of course - he knew the life of a hunter was not one of fond memories and frolicking in meadows. "I'm sorry, guys. I didn't mean to pry, really-"

Dean held a hand up. "Don't worry about it, man. Actually, uh..." He cleared his throat, standing up and pulling on a green jacket. "I think we're gonna head out. I'm beat, and I'm sure Cas is, too. Thanks for the beer, and the conversation." He smiled gratefully before turning towards the door, the angel following suit.

"No problem, man," Dale insisted. 

Once the two were fully out of earshot, Dale turned to Jim. "Pay up, dude. No proof."

Jim smirked. "You sure about that?" He gestured to the parking lot outside, where Dean and Castiel were sharing a tender kiss. 

"Goddamn it," Dale muttered.

"I think you owe me a steak dinner, my friend. Shall we?"


	3. Samulet 2.0

A/N: This one is really short but it's cute and I like it so whatever

It was Christmas for the Winchesters. Everyone, even Jody and the girls, Donna, and Rowena came to the bunker to celebrate with all the true Winchesters plus Castiel and Jack. 

The boys thought the grey concrete and steel of the building was too boring for the holidays, so they hung up multicoloured fairy lights throughout the whole bunker. But what was really impressive was the tree. 

At ten feet and change, it was the only thing around that was taller than Sam. They moved the map table out of the room and replaced it with the tree, which was decorated in gold and red ornaments, gently glowing lights sprinkled throughout.

There was a sizeable mountain of presents underneath, all wrapped with varying degrees of skill and different wrapping papers. 

After eating the breakfast the brothers had prepared (French toast, waffles, orange juice, chocolate milk, and fruit), everyone sat down and started opening presents.

Sam got a book on witchcraft for beginners from Rowena, who in return got jars of potion ingredients. 

Cas had apparently been shopping at the Hot Topical again because Claire opened a box with many necklaces and earrings. 

The presents went by in a blur, and soon enough the sky was full of stars outside and people started to head home. 

The Winchesters, Jack, and Cas were left watching cheesy holiday movies when Cas got up, claiming he needed Dean's help with something. 

Once they were in their room (yes, their room) Castiel shut the door and produced a small wrapped box from the pocket of his trenchcoat. "Do you remember the amulet Sam gave you many years ago? The one that is supposed to glow in God's presence?"

"Of course I do. Remember those girls who wrote the musical? They called it the samulet. They said it was 'a symbol of me and Sammy's brotherly love.'"

"Well, I think you're going to like this." Cas handed Dean the box.

Inside was a simple cord necklace, just like the samulet, except the charm was small silver wings. Dean put it on immediately, a smile across his entire face. "I love it, Cas. I'll never take it off." 

Dean leaned forward and kissed his angel, and the rest of that night was spent together.


	4. 2nd Winchester Vegas Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yes this one may or may not have been *inspired* by that one episode of Friends but I don't care it's fanfic no rules apply

Ever since the whole Becky-magically-drugging-Sam fiasco, the Winchesters tried to stay together during their annual Vegas pilgrimage. Until the year Cas came with them.

***

"Cas, you are going to love this," Dean said, leading the angel through crowds of people on Fremont Street to watch the light show. Sam was back in the brothers' hotel room (Cas had a separate one) because he "wanted to watch a documentary". During Vegas week. 

Strange. It's almost like he was trying to get Dean and Cas alone together. 

Dean had had a sort of mental break a week ago, where he almost screamed all of his pent-up feelings toward Cas. The two of them didn't talk about it again after that day, but ever since then, Sam had been trying to give the two some alone time.

"Oh, I remember Gabriel and Balthazar talking about this once," Cas said. "The largest video screen in the world."

All Dean could remember of that night were the diamonds in Cas' eyes as he watched the screen above them. It was one of the rare occasions when Dean drank enough to blackout any memories.

***

"Hey, Cas." Dean woke up in a hotel bed, smiling down at the angel cuddling next to him. The shirtless angel. "Wait. Cas?!" Dean sat bolt upright, racking his brain in a vain effort to remember the night before.

"Hello, Dean." Cas didn't seem like he noticed anything wrong, except for the complete and utter panic on Dean's face. "Are you okay?"

"Um... Cas, do you... remember what happened last night?"

"Of course. I retain everything. Do you not?"

"No, Cas. Uh... we didn't... do anything, did we?"

"You might want to see this." Castiel sat upright and placed his hands on either side of Dean's head.

"Cas... what are you doing?" Dean was very aware of the fact that neither he nor Castiel were actually wearing anything. 

Cas smiled. "Don't worry. I'm showing you my memory of last night."

"Oh. Okay." 

Suddenly, a strange feeling flooded Dean's head, and the hotel room was swept away, replaced by himself from Cas' point of view under the lights on Fremont Street. 

Dean watched the scene play out in front of him. It definitely felt familiar, but it was still a little fuzzy.

After a while, it came to the parts that Dean had no recollection of whatsoever. And what happened surprised him. 

But what surprised him more was the fact that he knew Cas was feeling the same things he was. He was excited and happy, and a little nervous. 

"Hey Cas, you know what would be really funny?" Dean could tell he was extremely drunk at this point, but Cas just went along with it.

Castiel smiled. "What?"

Dean absently pawed at Cas' hands, who let him hold them with a small smile. "If we dated." Dean mentally cringed at himself, but there was nothing he could do about it. It was like watching a movie of himself.

Dean could feel Cas' sudden longing and sadness, which confused him. 

"Yeah, that would be funny."

"Actually, you know what would be funnier?" Dean was absolutely giddy. His voice dropped to a low whisper. "If we got married."

"Dean, I don't think that's such a good idea." 

Dean was confused. He could feel Cas' emotions, but what he felt right now was... hope. And he felt Cas trying to restrict himself. But drunk Dean could break through those restrictions.

Dean watched with a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach as drunk Dean convinced Cas to get married.

"Come on, Cas, it's Vegas! Everyone gets married in Vegas!"

Cas let himself be dragged off and into a church a few blocks away. 

The whole wedding was a cringe-fest, so Cas decided to spare Dean the details. The memory picked back up after they were back in Cas' hotel room.

Dean could feel Cas' sadness. He thought that Dean didn't think twice about what just happened. 

Drunk Dean was still completely giddy, but some of the alcohol's effects had worn off a little bit, and the memory started to feel familiar to Dean. But he couldn't have predicted what happened next.

Dean leaned forward and grabbed the angel by his trench coat. Cas was too surprised to even say anything, let alone stop it. Dean leaned forward another inch and started kissing Castiel. 

AND HE WAS KISSING BACK.

The kiss started to get more heated, which is when Cas stopped the memory. "I think you can guess what happened next," Castiel said with a shy smile. And Dean could, because the rest of the memory came back to him, more or less. Let's just say Dean didn't really top.

"What... we... you let me... what the hell?" Dean was trying to pick something to focus on, but it all swirled around his head like he was in a giant blender of emotions. Finally, the blender stopped, and he found the part that freaked him out the most.

"You... you kissed me back." Dean tried to look at Castiel, but the angel wasn't meeting his eyes. He still kept that same sheepish smile, though.

"Yeah." After a few moments, Cas finally met Dean's eyes. "Dean, I know I haven't... been a very good friend lately. I chose to ignore what you were feeling rather than face my fears. I thought, maybe, if I ignored what you said, you'd start to realize how much... better you could do."

Dean's heart stopped. "Cas... there's no one better."

Cas slumped his shoulders down, putting his chin in his hands. "Dean, you know that's not true. I'm a broken angel. I've failed you, I've failed this world more times than I can count. I-"

"Cas, just shut up for a second, please." Dean placed a hand on Cas's back, unfamiliar with how to comfort Cas like this. "Yeah, you've made mistakes. But haven't we all? I mean, Sam started the freaking apocalypse. I was a demon." Dean paused. "Look, I don't care what mistakes you've made, because you're Cas. You're my best friend, and now, you're my husband, I guess." The two of them chuckled.

"Yeah, we might want to do something about that."

Dean smiled. "Do you wanna... I don't know, get some breakfast?"

Cas lifted his head and smiled back. "I'd love to."


	5. Halloween

"Jack, why do you even want to celebrate Halloween?" Cas and Jack were in the kitchen on October 1st. Dean was passed out in the study and Sam had fallen asleep at nine o'clock after eating a salad like the health nut he is.

"Sam and Dean were raised hunters, right? So I'm guessing they never got to have a real Halloween, or even eat candy when they were kids. And I'm guessing you didn't, either."

"That's correct. But we don't even have decorations, and we definitely don't have costumes."

"So I'll go buy some. I can be back here by midnight, and then you can help me decorate the bunker. Sam and Dean will wake up to the Halloween they never had."

***

"Oh, come on, Scrooge. Just let the kid have fun," Dean said, elbowing Sam in the ribs. The night before, Cas had tucked his boyfriend Dean next to him, and he paid dearly for it. When Dean woke up, he saw a fake spider hanging from the ceiling, thought it was real, pulled his gun out from under his pillow, and shot it.

"Easy for you to say. You're not the one he bought a costume for." Sam stared in horror at the long black cloak, broomstick, and pointed witch's hat that Jack expected him to wear.

"Hey, it's not my fault I already had a costume idea and you didn't. About that, Cas, I got one for you, too."

"Oh no. Dean, what are you planning?"

"Nothing!" Dean said, sounding like he very much had a plan. He slung his arm around Cas' shoulders. "All you have to worry about is being hot as hell, so there's really nothing to worry about." Dean winked and kissed his angel, which resulted in groaning from both Sam and Jack.

"Guys, please. You're so cheesy I can taste it."

Dean made a face at his brother. "Shut up, I'm happy."

***

"Really, Dean?" Cas walked out of his and Dean's shared bathroom into their shared room to show his boyfriend the ridiculous costume. The pitchfork and forked tail he could deal with, but the horns? It was just so inaccurate. "You know better than anyone that this is not what demons look like."

"Yeah, no demon is as gorgeous as you are," Dean said, walking across the room and lacing his arms around the angel's waist.

Castiel smiled and kissed the hunter. "Let's see your costume, then."

"Oh, no. That's gonna be a surprise for the party." He winked and kissed his angel once more before leaving to help Jack with snacks and get a final headcount on their Halloween party.

***

"Alright, kid, what do we got?" Dean joined Jack in the kitchen, the two standing before a truly epic spread of Halloween-themed treats.

"Everything is already either made or in the oven, so there's nothing to worry about."

"'Demon blood'?" Dean read off the label Jack wrote for the dark red punch. "Sammy's gonna love that. Anyway, who all is coming tonight?"

"Jody and Claire, Donna, Garth and Bess, Mary, of course, and Rowena."

"Awesome. Alright, you keep an eye on everything that's still baking, and it'll be seven o'clock before you know it."

***

As the sun set over the bunker, the Winchesters prepared for a night of spooks and fun.

Everyone arrived at a little later than 7, all wearing costumes. Garth and Bess wore werewolf costumes, complete with tattered flannels and fur-covered gloves. Claire had very intricate skeleton makeup, Jody was a zombie, Rowena was a fake witch (a lot like Sam's costume, actually), Mary was a ghost, and Jack was also a zombie. Everyone had their costume on except Dean, who was still keeping Cas in suspense.

Once everyone had been introduced and greeted, they were led to the Dean Cave. Jack brought out the food, and the party was started.

After everyone had eaten, they were all sitting around, telling stories. Soon enough, the topic of why Dean wasn't wearing a costume came up.

"Come on, Dean," Garth accused. "You can't not wear a costume at your own costume party."

"Alright, I guess you've all waited long enough." Dean left the room to put on his costume and came back about ten minutes later.

He wore a white suit, a metal halo, and big, fluffy, white wings.

"Seriously, Dean?" Cas called from the couch.

"Seriously." Dean sank down next to his angel, who seemed to be trying very hard to burrow his head into Dean's arm. "Oh, come on, Cas. You don't see an angel and a demon together every day."

Cas smiled. "Fair enough."

And he spent the rest of the night next to those huge, fluffy, fake feathers, which seemed intent on hitting him in the face every two minutes.

But it was worth it.


	6. Blasphemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is like one of favourites ever I really like it so I hope y'all enjoy

Since the moment he was created, Castiel was completely unaware of anything more than obedience. He never felt emotions, never hesitated, never flinched. That is until he met the green-eyed, bow-legged, flannel-wearing Dean Winchester.

Castiel couldn't quite put his finger on how Dean was different from all the other humans he'd seen. Dean was the angel's mission from his father. God had big plans for this man.

Castiel had been watching over Dean and his brother since their mother died. He'd seen them grow up, he'd seen Sam leave for college, he'd seen Dean join the family business because he was too loyal to his father to disobey.

Castiel could understand that. Loyalty was one of his weak points.

Of course, the entire Heavenly Host was built to be soldiers of the Lord; unwavering, unoriginal, trusting orders they didn't feel the need to question. Castiel was the same.

Until he met Dean.

This man and his brother were different from the thousands of humans that Castiel had watched. They were different from the noteworthy ones that the angels told stories about, the ones that made the history books, the ones that made a mark on the world.

And sure, Sam and Dean made their mark on the world and saved it countless times, but they also left an indelible impression on Castiel.

The Winchesters taught him about free will, about love, about listening to your doubts because, more often than not, they're the things that tell you when what you're doing is wrong.

They taught him about family, and how it doesn't end in blood. About how you don't leave family behind. About how you love them with all your being, even if they infuriate you.

And above all, they taught him forgiveness.

Castiel had made his mistakes. He'd killed so many of his brothers and sisters in Heaven, even more on Earth. But the Winchesters forgave him. They saved him.

The old Castiel wouldn't have seen it, the Castiel before he met these extraordinary men. He would've thought, as most angels did, that they were just blindly, insanely co-dependent on each other.

And sure, maybe that was true, but there was more to them. Castiel had seen past the hard, flannel-wrapped exterior to all the complexities inside. He could see how intelligent Dean really was, although he chose not to show it and let Sam be the, as many put it, 'brains of the operation'. He could see how much Sam depended on his big brother, and he could see how Dean knew that. But first and foremost, he could see how much the brothers had changed him.

Over the years, Castiel had grown to be more human. He felt things he knew angels couldn't, or else they would be killed. He felt pain and grief, but most of all, he felt love. 

He loved his Father's creation with all his existence. Of course, all of the angels were told to love His creations more than Him, but Castiel had never truly felt it until Dean was put in his charge. He began to see the beauty in this flawed world. And he saw how the flaws made this world and its inhabitants beautiful.

He saw what an angel never could. And for that, he fell.


	7. Learning About Humanity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is kinda short too but I think it's really cute :)

While Dean was away on hunts, Castiel liked to learn as much as he could about his favourite human and his interests. Unfortunately, Cas was not very familiar with the wide, wide world of sports, nor did he care much for them. But he cared for Dean, so he put in as much effort as he could.

During one particular case that seemed stranger than normal (and therefore would probably take longer), Cas stayed at the bunker, cooking up some white lie about inventory. He took a trip down to the Lebanon local library and checked out Sports For Dummies.

He was halfway through the football section when he heard the loud creaking of the iron door, immediately jumping up and shoving the book into his trench coat. Dean must've forgotten something in the bunker. "Hello, Dean," he said, trying to sound casual.

"...Cas? What's up?" Dean lumbered down the stairs and kissed his angel on the crown of his head, his green eyes crinkling at the corners as he smiled.

"Nothing. I was just about to get started on research."

Dean's smile faltered. "Research? I thought you were doing inventory."

"Oh, yes, of course. That's what I meant."

"Cas?" Dean stopped in front of the angel and kneeled so that they were eye to eye with each other. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing," he kept saying. "I just... I get worried when you go out on hunts." Cas must've been getting better at acting because Dean bought it.

"Aww, my poor baby," Dean cooed. He stood up and offered his hand to Cas, who accepted it. Soon Cas was pulled up to stand, Dean kissing him.

Dean deepened the kiss, snaking his arms around Castiel's waist as he did so. Strangely, he felt something in Cas' pocket. Dean pulled away. "Whatcha got there?" He started to pull the object out of the angel's pocket; feeling that it was a book before seeing the title, and seeing how much Cas was sweating, he said, "Cas, is this porn?"

Cas looked at Dean in surprise. "What? Of course not."

Dean, realizing what the title of the book was, chuckled. "Cas, I thought you knew sports."

Cas looked down at his shoes in shame. "I was just pretending."

Dean lifted Cas's chin with a single finger, kissing him until he smiled. "Cas, you never have to pretend around me. I know you're not the most... well-versed in human things, but if you don't know about something, just ask me." He smiled and kissed Cas again before realizing that he left Sam outside in the car, waiting for him. "Damn it. I have to go. Let's pick this back up when I get back, okay?" He kissed Cas again and left the bunker, a giant smile plastered on his face the whole drive to the murder scene.

A/N: I've had this idea for a really long time (mostly because, like Cas, I have no idea how sports work) but anyway I thought it was kinda cute. Also, the end is kind of unintentionally inspired by malec but I have no control over that part of my brain anyway


	8. Happy Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *SPOILER WARNING FOR 15x18*

"We'll lose." Dean paced the room slowly, hopeless. "I just led us into another trap, all because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do."

Cas walked towards him. "Dean..."

"It was Chuck all along. We shouldn't have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them right now." He could barely keep the tears from spilling, keep his voice from breaking. "Everybody's gonna die, Cas. Everybody. I can't stop it." He walked closer to Cas, trying however he could to get the angel to listen. "She's gonna get through that door."

"I know." Cas's voice was quiet, a whisper of breath leaving his mouth just as any semblance of hope already had.

"And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me."

They locked eyes. Cas knew exactly how hopeless the situation was, but he couldn't bring himself to say it. Saying it would make it real.

Dean broke his gaze. "I'm sorry."

Cas racked his brain, searching through any possible solutions in his mind. Finally, he came up with one; a sacrifice, yes. But at least Dean would be okay. "Wait, there is... There's one thing she's afraid of. There's one thing strong enough to stop her. When Jack was dying, I made a deal to save him."

Dean's eyes blazed, his temporary anger overpowering the despair. "You what?"

"The price was my life. When I experienced a moment of true happiness, The Empty would be summoned, and it would take me forever."

"Why are you telling me this now?"

Cas didn't try to hold the tears back; if he did, he'd never get through this. "I always wondered, ever since I took that burden, that curse, I wondered what it could be. What my true happiness could even look like. I never found an answer because the one thing I want... It's something I know I can't have. But I think I know... I think I know now. Happiness isn't in the having, it's in just being. It's in just saying it."

Dean tried to feign ignorance. If he acted like Cas wasn't telling him what he thought he was, maybe he would be right. Cas was talking about... about raising Jack or saving the world. Something. Anything. Anything other than what he thought it was. "What are you talking about, man?" He heard the words waver in the air, feebly echoing in the air around them.

"I know. I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive, and you're angry, and you're broken. You're 'daddy's blunt instrument.' And you think that hate and anger, that's... That's what drives you, that's who you are. It's not. And everyone who knows you see it. Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You raised your little brother for love. You fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are. You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know." He smiled, fully crying now. "You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of Hell... Knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam, I cared about Jack... I cared about the whole world because of you." He laughed sadly as a tear traced its way down his cheek. "You changed me, Dean."

Dean could barely speak, swallowing hard. "Why does this sound like a goodbye?"

"Because it is." Those three words held an apology, a freedom, a second chance, a farewell. Dean inhaled, ready to argue, ready to say anything, but Castiel speaks before he can. "I love you." His face hardened in determination, his jaw trembling but his eyes clear of any regret or guilt. 

"Cas, I-" Dean stopped short. He was about to say something meaningless, something he knew he'd regret later on. He felt his eyes burning, his vision slowly blurring at the edges, but he pressed on. "Thank you. Thank you. God, thank you." He felt his knees threatening to give out; at the same moment, he heard something behind him. 

He looked, the tears blurring the cloud of black. The Empty. 

He turned back to Cas, and the sickening drop in his stomach grew bigger. The door flew open, revealing Billie and her scythe. She looked almost like she was about to burst into flames; although, with her being Death, it was highly possible. 

Dean turned back, seeing Cas standing there, at peace with his fate. He saw the black cloud reach for Cas, and all thought left his mind. He just acted.

***

Lunging toward the angel, he tackled him to the ground, shielding Cas's body with his own. He could hear Billie trying to run towards them, but the low sloshing of the Shadow changed its pitch. It was moving away from them, towards Billie.

Dean could feel the cloud's indecision, praying to the universe that it wouldn't take Cas. Not now. Not yet.

Not when he could just now see a light at the end of the tunnel. 

He kept Cas on the ground until the room went dead silent, save for Dean's heart-attack breathing. Slowly he raised his head, lifting himself into an awkward twisted position. 

The room was empty. The only evidence that any life-threatening cosmic entities had even been there was the open door, the sigil still smouldering. 

He turned back to Cas, who was flat on the floor. His beautiful blue eyes were edged with red, his mouth slightly parted in surprise. 

"Did- did we just-"

"We did." Dean laughed incredulously before he remembered why the Shadow had been there in the first place. Cas...

Cas loved him.

Which meant... what? Did he love him like a brother? That must be it. That had to be it. If it wasn't it, then... Dean didn't know how to do this. How to... how to turn down someone that important to him. Someone so vital. Or would he even turn Cas down?

Somehow, he dreaded that idea even more.

Before he could figure out how to broach the subject, Cas did it for him. "Dean, I... You can disregard everything I said. I know you... are not... that way. With, uh... with men. I can assure you, I will not let it affect our relationship and I will not bring it up again." He started to walk towards the door, and all of that fear, all of that dread, drained right out of Dean.

"Cas, wait." He grabbed the angel's arm, the familiar fabric grounding him. "Thank you, Cas." His voice was raw, threatening to give out once again. "Thank you for- for telling me. I know how... uh, how hard that must have been." 

Castiel flashed him a wan smile, turning quickly on his heels again as Dean released his arm. He sped down the hall, his trench coat billowing up behind him like a cape. The closing of his bedroom door could probably have been heard throughout the entire bunker; it could certainly be heard by Dean.

Dean stood there for a second, or it may have been minutes. Hell, it may have been freaking hours.

He could just ignore it. He and Cas would call Sam and Jack, see how they were doing, and they'd forget the whole thing. Right?

But why did the mere thought of doing that make him so nauseous?

***

"Hey, Cas?" Dean rapped quietly on the closed door, surprised when Cas opened it less than five seconds later, a strained smile plastered on his face.

"Is there anything you need?"

"No, I, uh..." Dean sheepishly rubbed his neck. What did he think would happen, that Cas would make the first move and he could just stand there and not burst into flames? Ah, screw it all. He'd done this a thousand times, what made this time any harder? It's Cas, a tiny voice in his head said. You've never cared about anyone else this much.

Son of a bitch.

Cas had started this, hadn't he? It was only fair for Dean to keep it going.

Dean had to be sure not to make this "not-thinking-just-acting" thing a habit, but in the present situation, it was his only choice. Thinking about it too much was guaranteed to end in him chickening out, and he couldn't risk that.

He leaned forward, hearing Cas's grunt of surprise as their lips connected. One hand wound itself around Cas's waist, holding the angel as close as Dean dared. The other hand snaked up to hold the back of Castiel's neck, brushing over the soft curls. 

Cas was caught well off-guard at first, but he soon melted into Dean's touch, kissing back desperately. It was as if their lives depended on it; of course, after twelve years of hopeless longing, I'm sure it felt that way. 

Unfortunately, Dean's phone started ringing. He groaned, seeing that it was Sam calling.

"Little busy here, Sam," he said, annoyed.

Sam's sigh of relief crackled through the receiver. "Oh, thank God. You're still alive."

"What?"


End file.
